Moneyshake Euro 2020 Starting XI: Football Team Of Cars

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We’re avid fans of football and cars here at Moneyshake. With Euro 2020 going ahead this summer following postponement last year because of the coronavirus, we thought we’d create our own starting XI – of cars!

Now bear with us on this; it’s not as ridiculous as it sounds. When you think about it, cars and footballers have a lot in common – some are very efficient, others deliver power when you need it most, then there’s always a star that you just can’t help but get excited about when you see it.

 

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Here’s our own line-up using the popular 4-3-3 formation.

 

Goalkeeper: BMW X7

 
BMW X7 on a gravel track
 

Standing at 1,805mm the BMW X7 is by no means the tallest of goalkeepers out there – 5 feet and 9 inches, in fact. However, the legendary Colombian keeper Rene Higuita who is said to have invented the ‘scorpion kick’ was exactly the same height.

Now we’re not saying that the X7 will pull out these moves in goal, but its standard acceleration of 0-60mph in just 6.1 seconds is uber-quick for a car that weighs almost 2.5 tonnes.

 

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Left-back: Range Rover Evoque

 
Range Rover Evoque left back
 

You always want a bit of style, pace and presence on your left flank of the defence, don’t you? Well, the Range Rover Evoque ticks all these boxes. We’ve gone for the powerful, efficient ‘P300e’ plug-in hybrid spec which has a 304bhp drivetrain that sends it from 0-60mph in just 6.4 seconds.

With Land Rover being a British manufacturer too, we’d consider the Evoque to be our very own Luke Shaw.

 

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Right-back: Audi Q5

 
Audi Q5 driving through the desert
 

Fitting in the gap between the smaller Audi Q3 and goliath Q7, the Audi Q5 is a solid halfway house. It’s still got imposing size, being a mid-size SUV, which makes it a great choice for a ‘rock at the back’. Another fun fact is that it has the smallest turning circle of any car like it, so it can be quick to pounce on attackers if a through ball is played down the right-hand side.

Just like the entire Audi range, the Q5 has German roots and has a mature, premium design that never seems to falter on the big stage. In a way, you could compare it to the veteran Mats Hummels.

 

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Centre-back: Range Rover Sport

 
Range Rover Sport Centre-Back
 

Arguably one of the number one superstar luxury cars you can buy – the Range Rover Sport comes with sophisticated four-wheel drive and a powerful engine range that delivers supple, smooth performance.

Purely because of its size too, the Range Rover Sport is a perfect fit as a Harry Maguire-esque centre-back. Its six-foot-tall body makes for an imposing presence at the back.

 

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Centre-back: Volvo XC60

 
Volvo XC60 in the woods
 

The Volvo XC60 is one of a few Volvo models that have taken the brand to new heights in recent years.

Everything about the XC60 screams reliable centre-back, including mind-boggling array of safety systems that ensure it corrects any mistakes. Why don’t all defenders come with stability and traction control?

Just like with the Evoque, we’ve chosen the properly rapid ‘T6 Recharge’ model which has a 0-60 time of 5.9 seconds. Its combination of efficiency and power reminds us of the solid Swede defender Victor Lindelöf. With a fantastic combined fuel economy of 113mpg too, your defender on the right will have enough stamina to go the full game and still be spritely.

 

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Left midfielder: Renault Megane R.S.

 
Renault Megane R.S. midfielder
 

If you’re going to choose a midfield three, you need players that are dynamic and aren’t afraid to work. Those individuals that can shine on their own but that know how to be a team player.

What better car to fit this bill than the Renault Megane R.S.? It’s loud for starters, probably one of the best-sounding hot hatches on the market. So we know it’ll do a good job of organising the centre of the park.

More importantly, its 1.8-litre turbocharged petrol engine has 296bhp which gets it up to motorway speed in 5.7 seconds. Throw in Renault’s advanced 4Control four-wheel drive setup and you’ve got yourself an N’Golo Kante on four wheels.

 

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Centre midfielder: Skoda Fabia

 
Skoda Fabia - central midfielder
 

The Skoda Fabia is predominantly built in its Volkswagen parent’s plants so it comes with a decent level of reliability. Just like the brand’s slogan suggests, it’s also simply clever.

For the reasons above, we’ve opted for the car equivalent of Czech first team midfielder Tomas Soucek. Both share the same quality of becoming sensations in what seems to be a short space of time.

 

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Right midfielder: Cupra Formentor

 
Cupra Formentor - left midfielder
 

The Cupra Formentor has been a formidable model in the Spanish manufacturer’s line-up since it began making its own bespoke models. Before it was merely a performance arm of Seat, but now its range consists of some highly sought after vehicles that look menacing and perform just as hungrily out on the road.

We see the Formentor being a linchpin of our Euros starting XI, a bit like Thiago Alcántara for the same home nation of Spain. Just like Thiago’s 90% pass completion rate in the 2020/21 Premier League season, the Formentor has precision in its locker when it comes to delivering creativity when it matters.

This is true even for the entry-level V1 spec, which comes with clever systems such as adaptive cruise control and a profile selection function that lets you to adapt the car’s performance to your requirements.

 

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Right forward: Volvo XC40

 
Volvo XC40 - centre forward
 

I’m sure you’re all just as devastated about the news that Zlatan Ibrahimović won’t be at this year’s Euros due to injury. However, we’ve got just the Swede to replace him.

The Volvo XC40 is just as popular worldwide as the big friendly giant Zlatan, with the car being one of Volvo’s best-selling models. When you take into consideration its ferocious power (even the entry-level 1.5-litre petrol engine gets a hefty 163bhp) and imposing presence, we think it’s a worthy forward option to trouble opposition defences.

 

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Left forward: BMW M5 Competition

 
BMW M5 Competition - left forward
 

What more could you want from your wide man in a front three other than blistering pace that could show most defenders a clean set of heels? Well, that was our logic when we chose the BMW M5 Competition to fill in this position.

0-60mph takes just 3.3 seconds in the M5. Couple that frightening pace with laser precision delivery – like the real life rapid German forward Leroy Sané – and you can see why the M5 had to make it into our attack.

 

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Centre forward: Maserati Levante Trofeo

 
Maserati Levante Trofeo - right forward
 

Completing our front free is the super SUV Maserati Levante Trofeo. With a 572bhp twin-turbo V8 engine under the hood that erupts the moment you press the accelerator, the partnership with the M5 on the flanks is enough to strike fear into even the most brave defenders.

What’s more impressive is that, just like Ciro Immobile who we draw comparisons with, it has a strong presence. This is mostly thanks to its 2,170kg weight and short, stocky stance. Coming up against strong, pacey centre-backs is a battle that the punchy Italian will fancy its chances in.

 

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